FA turn down the music

I was gutted this week to read that the FA have said that there will be 'no official England World Cup song' this summer, as it's about football, not about songs. I for one am glad the FA cleared that last bit up, because I always thought the World Cup was about some washed-up indie band or patriotic comedian singing, and had absolutely nothing to do with football. Whether the songs are good (Baddiel & Skinner take a bow), bad (Embrace) or downright forgettable (Rider feat. Terry Venables anyone?), one thing is for sure- yet another year has gone past without Wayne Rooney rapping in homage to John Barnes.

I've always liked the curiosity that surrounds the World Cup song. Admittedly, the last one (World at your Feet) was dire and downbeat, but we have had some crackers in the past. I've been championing the Kaiser Chiefs for years to step up to the plate and record an anthemic terrace chant-style song, and I believe, as avid supporters of Leeds United, that they'd relish the chance. There's nothing better than switching on Top of the Pops 2 a week before the big kick-off and seeing David Baddiel and Frank Skinner jumping up and down singing 'Three Lions'. The highlight for me is seeing Baddiel holding his own as a half-decent singer, while Skinner jumps up and down like a maniac singing, it has to be said, appallingly. And who can forget 'World in Motion'? After 'Three Lions', in my view, the best World Cup song, simply for John Barnes' rap in the middle, which totally disproves the stereotype that all Jamaicans have rhythm.

The key to these songs is the way they transfer to the terraces. Even the Germans now sing 'Football's Coming Home', which makes football seem like a dreadful biggamist, but hats off to Baddiel and Skinner. I can't imagine anyone singing 'World at your Feet' in the stands, and although I would pay a considerable sum of money to see it become a reality, the idea of 40,000 English fans rapping to 'World in Motion' is ludicrous. The best terrace chants are the ones that have history, think 'I'm Forever Blowing Bubbles', 'Keep Right On' or 'You'll Never Walk Alone'. Obviously, you can't create historical significance in a month-long tournament, which is why the chants either need comedy (Ant and Dec's 'We're on the Ball), or an easy rhythm and melody (think Fat Les and 'Vindaloo' but without such bizarre lyrics). Considering this man will do anything for money while he's in vogue, why not give the job to James Corden? His Comic Relief sketch featuring the England players was inspired, and the 'Gavin and Stacey' scene where Corden's character Smithy, Gavin and Gavin's Mum and Dad rap to 'World in Motion' could be a surefire hit in seconds.

The best bands wouldn't want the poisoned chalice- Embrace got the job because they were on the way down, which is why bands like Kaiser Chiefs and Kasabian won't have it. At least now anyone can write a World Cup song and release it we might get some originality and perhaps some humour. Thank God Jedward aren't English...